Picture Daze -By Marti S

Picture Daze
- By Marti S

I posted this originally on September 16, 2011, one calendar year from the day I discovered the "sheet" in my right breast and my life changed forever. Today is picture day at my school, AGI. I am still out because of my fairly recent right mastectomy, but this day has put me in a reflective mood. It's ironic in a way that today is the first day after my surgery that I have been allowed to take a real, honest-to-goodness shower. That's because exactly one year ago today while I was taking a shower I found that "sheet" in my right breast. I was pretty darn sure that this weird "thing" had not been there the day before.

I'm lucky in that I never went through the denial phase - at least not the part that makes many women initially avoid medical treatment fearing the worst. I wanted to be seen THAT DAY and thanks to a great PCP here in my hometown, I did get seen that very day.

He didn't think it was cancer for a few very plausible sounding reasons - early cancer is usually not painful but yet I was quite tender over the sheet, I'd had a routine screening mammogram just the Feb. prior which had shown no changes over the prior 3 years, etc. etc. He said, though, that ANYTHING in the breast needed to be investigated and set me up for a diagnostic mammo, ultrasound, and a consultation with expectation of a biopsy with a local general surgeon.

When I saw that surgeon about a week and a half later, he said words that I will never forget: "Well, you hear of Inflammatory Breast Cancer." That was news to me. While I haven't practiced in over 20 years, I hold a BS in nursing from Texas Woman's University and at least remember some things medical. I certainly had NEVER heard of such a thing as IBC!

Even though his words convinced me I needed to find someone with actual expertise in IBC - I fairly quickly found Dr. C - you can't find much more of an expert than he - my sister feels the fact that that surgeon said those words constituted the first miracle in my year-long journey toward NED.

Today, I'm still experiencing post-op pain and now with both drains finally out, I actually, literally can hear myself slosh when I walk. But I'm here - alive, feeling better all the time, and very hopeful for the future.

I'm triple negative and I know at least something of what that means. I know full well that the road ahead may carry with it many "speed bumps" but I've got a chance. I want to get back to work doing what I do best - helping kids with learning problems believe in themselves enough that with the right approaches they can start making up for lost time, learn to read, understand math, and become active, contributing, happy citizens of this amazingly wonderful country of ours.

I am completely humbled by the outpouring of support that I have experienced over the last year - this group, my family, my wonderful friends and colleagues at my school, my church including our amazing associate pastor who has visited with me when fears of infection have kept me away from Sunday services, and the many prayer groups of a wide variety of demoninations and faiths who have held me up to God in prayer.

Today will pass, I'll continue to recover from my surgery, and for the most part I'll go back to living my life more or less "normally."

If given the choice would I "pass" on this IBC journey? In a heart beat! But I have learned some things that I probably would never have learned in any other way, and for that much I am grateful.

I've never set up a blog but from time to time, I've let FB notes serve that purpose. Thanks to any and all who read this note and thanks so much more to ALL who have supported me. My journey isn't over but what a milestone today represents for me! God bless you all.